The Cungpret lyfe

I remember losing one by one, people who I loved.  I remember crying until I  fall asleep and hoping it's just a dream People die, people left, people gone. And all those memories remain to make you great and bitter Making you strong enough to carry on Moving forward with the grief that life gave you As you grow old, you've seen people carry that weight And when you see the mirror, you saw that weight on your shoulder When bad things happen you still cry but you moved on When life knocked you down, you get up and realized it's just life Your grief becomes muted You didn't talk about it, too much Because others had the same grief And you don't have to tell the world about your broken heart As they only said, "moved on" But in your grief you realized there's wound that never heal There's heart that can not be repaired There's relationship that can not be change And that's okay It's life, and you've just got to live with it. 

Sebelum kamu jatuh pada senyum dan tawa yang selalu kutunjukkan, kamu harus tahu, bahwa ada banyak luka yang ku bawa kemanapun aku pergi Sebelum kamu jatuh cinta pada cahaya yang terlihat dari mataku, ketahuilah bahwa ada kegelapan pekat bersarang saat malam tiba Sebelum kamu jatuh cinta pada semangat yang menulari tubuhmu, diam- diam aku berharap tidak bangun lagi dari tidurku Sebelum kamu jatuh cinta pada kekuatan yang selalu membuatku tegar, dalam sunyi aku kehabisan tenaga untuk berjuang terlihat baik- baik saja Banyak yang jatuh cinta pada kebahagiaan semu, tapi tidak banyak yang bisa menerima luka yang disembunyikan dengan baik Banyak yang memberikan luka hingga lupa bahwa kenangan baik pun bisa berubah buruk dengan segala kekhilafan mereka Aku kehabisan kesabaran untuk memaklumkan Aku kehabisan pemakluman untuk alasan- alasan tidak masuk akal Aku kelelahan untuk berjuang dari awal.  Aku ingin diberikan tempat spesial tanpa harus berjuang keras untuk m...

Introducing Letting go isn't gift you receive It's a never-ending lesson that you have to gain You fought You get hurt You lose yourself You are drowning in anger You lost You win You Bleed And all that feelings mix up and become a beautiful painting Or maybe... A hurtful lyric But the storm will teach you everything You become somebody else Better... Unbreakable Because they made you feel the hell And you come back as a complete human. Broken, but beautiful. The process I know... It's sad, isn't? To watch someone you fought for, hurt you with all of his heart To see the love of your life take away your pride To feel someone you use to lay on, ripped your heart apart And after all, you see yourself breaking, with the tears that made you shake every night Then, your world has completed ending You feel numb Worthless Unwanted... To b e continued

Smile though your heart is aching Smile even though it's breaking When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by If you smile through your fear and sorrow Smile and maybe tomorrow You'll see the sun come shining through for you Light up your face with gladness Hide every trace of sadness Although a tear may be ever so near That's the time you must keep on trying Smile, what's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile If you just smile That's the time you must keep on trying Smile, what's the use of crying ? You'll find that life is still worthwhile If you just smile

Manusia mudah berjanji, membuat yang lain percaya, banyak berharap, bermimpi, mendamba... Lalu setelah selesai atau bosan, dia menghancurkannya dengan sekejap, dengan ingkar, tanpa menaruh peduli. Lalu pergi... Seakan tidak ada apa- apa.  Setelahnya, ia mencuci tangannya dengan bersih, pergi tidur dengan nyenyak, tanpa merasa bersalah. Tidak ada rasa menggantung dalam hati, bagaimana perasaan orang yang ditinggalkan, bagaimana hidup dan harapan orang yang lain yang sudah dihancurkan, yang terpenting hidupnya aman dan dia telah membuang semuanya. Memulai hidup baru dari kehancuran orang lain. Janji hanyalah kata yang diucapkan saat itu. Tidak untuk dijadikan kenyataan. Janji menjadi kata untuk menenangkan sesaat dan kemudian dibuang saat sudah bosan.

" I love you to the moon and back" This is how much i love you. But you don't. Simply just don't. And you left so easily Bring chaos with no remedy. Oh, i miss you everyday Keep my tears falling down Asking God, praying for a heal Or just take all the pain I'm tired of crying I'm tired of trying I'm tired for hoping She should get a trophy for making me so useless and not worthed. She did it sucessfully.

If you were here... i'll tell you everything and i'll cry a lot. I wish you could help me through this all and you hug me when i needed too. I wish you calm me down and tell you were here forever and i don't have to be afraid. I wish you never left Why in the hell is this happen to me? I wish you make it through Or God give you a second chance And make it all right There's too much sorrow to bear I can't hold it much longer I'm sorry i keep calling your name I'm sorry i keep screaming your name in my tears I wish you were here I wish we could share this story I wish, i wish you are still here with me. They broke me until there's nothing left And they keep adding more and more, torture me with their ways. They took what i keep fighting for years And they degrade me, how could they do that? After all i've been through. Why they still do this to me? They crush it. They stole, broke it and never return it back to me. I'm numb. Wh...

Gue adalah orang yang tidak setuju jika ada yang menyamakan kehilangan karena kematian dan kehilangan karena dia memilih pergi. Ketika berurusan dengan kematian, seseorang yang kita sayang direnggut oleh maut, karena keputusan Tuhan. Disitu kita menghadapi keadaan yang, mau lu nangis darah pun dia nggak akan kembali . Disini lu berhadapan dengan Tuhan, yang segala keputusan-Nya adalah mutlak dan hakiki. Siapa sih elu dibandingkan dengan Tuhan, penguasa seluruh alam semesta, yang punya setiap jiwa di dunia ini? Ada perasaan berserah pada apapun yang terjadi. Lawan lu bukan manusia, jadi, pasrah karo sing gawe urip, ndok. Sementara jika kehilangan orang yang masih hidup, dan dia pergi meninggalkan elu. Ada rasa pias dan ngenes karena ternyata elu bukan pilihannya. Segala daya upaya yang dilakukan sia- sia karena mahluk yang disebut manusia itu pergi begitu aja, tanpa mengindahkan segala sesuatu yang telah dilalui bersama. Lagi- lagi, kalau belum pernah ngalamin sendiri keduanya, kamu...

I'm not okay Something ripped from my life Someone has leaving me behind Pain that never go away Still burns me everyday

You deserve someone who listens to you Hears every word and knows what to do When you’re feeling hopeless lost and confused There’s somebody out there who will You need a man who holds you for hours Make your friends jealous When he brings you flowers And laughs when he says they don’t have love like ours There somebody out there who will There’s somebody out there who’s looking for you Someday he’ll find you, I swear that its true He’s gonna kiss you and you’ll feel the world stand still There’s somebody out there who will He’ll take you dancing and pull you in close Spin you around and won’t let you go Till they turn the lights off and he’ll take you home There’s somebody out there who will There’s somebody out there who’s looking for you Someday he’ll find you I swear that its true He’s gonna kiss you and you’ll feel the world stand still There’s someb...

Sewaktu SD kelas 1, saat gue belum terlalu pintar merangkai kata, bahkan huruf pun masih ga lancar, gue marah sama nyokap karena ninggalin gue sendirian. Gue ambil buku tulis, buka halaman paling belakang, lantas gue coret- coret pake pensil 2B gue sampe puas, terus gue hapus dan kemarahan gue pun hilang. Sampai sekarang, saat gue punya masalah, gue masih suka coret- coret, tapi di layar dan bisa dilihat orang. Gue pengen nulis dari hati, mungkin permasalahannya ga bisa gue buka lebar- lebar dalam tulisan, karena yaaa dilihat orang kan? berasa infotainment, buk ... Tapi seenggaknya ini sedikit melegakan. Well i have a problem, huge problem.  Kalau ada yang bilang, " Tuhan Maha Membolak-balikkan Hati dan Keadaan ", yes, He is. 2 minggu yang lalu, gue adalah manusia yang bahagia, ada beban tapi yaudahlah, namanya beban hidup, biasaaaa. Minggu ini gue manusia yang lagi memunggut hatinya yang jatuh hingga hancur lebur. Yang nafasnya sesak karena hatinya sakit. Rasanya operas...

Siap- siap ngenes, ya, bacanya :( So... kemarin gue baru aja kehilangan sesuatu yang berharga. Sesuatu yang selalu menjadi andalan gue, setiap hari, setiap pagi, setiap saat dibutuhkan baik dalam kencan, rapat, hangout atau waktu gue lagi rajin- rajinnya. It's my make up pouch and my favorite socks. Jadi tas gue yang biasa diganti lagi dicuci. Gue males gonta ganti tas sebenernya, why? karena gue lupaan, kalo tas gue nggak ganti- ganti, gue ga akan ketinggalan apa- apa. Tapi itu tas kotor banget pasca gue ke makam papa dan kena tanah liat makam. Karena tas gue lagi dicuci, gue ganti tas jadi tas mini gitu, pouch gue ga muat dong. Yaudah gue bawa paper bag wardah buat naro pouch sekaligus kaos kaki kesayangan gue, lantas pas naik kereta, penuh ya karena baru hari pertama masuk pasca libur lebaran. Gue taro itu tas di bagasi atas kereta. Pas turun gue lupa... Gue keinget, lalu turun dari kereta, saat itu gue masih di manggarai sih, tapi kereta gue udah balik ke Bekasi. Gu...

We're fight again.. and today i realize, i want someone to treat me better Someone who understand how to treat a lady who apologize whenever he should be sorry who act as gentleman whatever the situation is a real gentleman who won't asking to take me home and feel worry when i'm not around a gentleman who love me more than his ego someone who understand when i have a trouble to go to sleep who talk smoothly when i'm upset and trying to comfort when i'm afraid i've tried to be positive of whatever you do whatever you say, and everything that you never did right now i feel exhausted to always feel positive back then, i always think.. that is who you are i have to accept for everything you are that you will change , somehow and love will lead you to be a good guy but maybe now, maybe this is the edge of my acceptance an acceptance that i always try to gave you for everything you do, whatever you are, whatever it takes, but everytime you h...

I feel exhausted.. I have just lost my dad about 45 days ago I found myself being leader of this family I got sick. a serious one so have to take a medicine for at least 6 months, non stop My relationship come to an end (i told this last night) I have to bring back my insanity I have to let my feelings go away I have to fixed my relationship I have to take care my body I have to.. Love my self Live my life Start again Tell me, God.. what kind of plan do you have for me? I feel exhausted.. so bad